Right now I am trying to work up some courage to set a new testing date. I log on to Pearson Vue as if I am going to pay my $200 again but then wind up wimping out. Why?
I am just not sure which date I am striving for. March? June? The test is expensive which means flying somewhere. There is so much riding on this test and I need to be smart about this.
Will I be ready in one month's time to take this test? This is a time that I will have available to fly out. Or, should I just keep sputtering along and wait to take it in June? That is another time when I will be free to take it. Questions, questions, questions.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Starting over
This is my second day home from work sick. I already called off again for tomorrow. Aside from my aches and pains, a great deal of it is mental fatigue. I am tired!
I did not pass my NCLEX exam. This news came after I had already named it and claimed it and told the whole wide world I had. Talk about stepping out on faith and falling. I was absolutely crushed and way too embarrassed to recall the email except for two people—my biggest cheerleaders.
Crushed is an absolute understatement. I was floored. The wind had been knocked out of me. I just knew that I had it in the bag. No one could tell me that I did not study. I did. More so than anything I answered questions over and over and over again.
Once the computer shut off at 75 I was relieved as hell. Those questions were tough. I was practically squirming in the seat, praying for strength, and constantly monitoring the question numbers until I reached 75. I was delighted it cut off then because I did not know how much more punishment I could take. I might’ve died if I had to test all the way to 265. So, when it did cut off at 75 I was just as surprised as relieved. I left the testing center feeling lighter on my feet, but not having the slightest idea how it went for me. Not being one to be negative . . . I needed to believe that I had passed and the celebrations began.
The day that I returned to work, the Monday after Thanksgiving, I logged onto the Pearson Vue website for the unofficial quick results and saw the word fail “fail”. I just kept looking at the computer screen because it was so unbelievable. “There must be some mistake. Especially since they are unofficial results and all,” I kept saying to myself. There’s no way in the world I could’ve gone through all of that and failed that test. Well, that is exactly what happened.
My co-workers inquired about my results. “Oh, they haven’t come in yet,” I said.
In desperate need of advice, I contacted a former classmate who admitted in a group email that he failed it once too. He said two things that I have taken to heart: (1) take a small break studying again; and (2) change the way you study. In other words, do not do the same thing you did before. Made since to me.
Since the end of November 2007 until the second week in January, I have done no NCLEX studying. I have moaned a bit at the thought of starting that crap (studying) all over again.
My former classmate warned me against thinking that with Kaplan that a magic door would open up.
I did not pass my NCLEX exam. This news came after I had already named it and claimed it and told the whole wide world I had. Talk about stepping out on faith and falling. I was absolutely crushed and way too embarrassed to recall the email except for two people—my biggest cheerleaders.
Crushed is an absolute understatement. I was floored. The wind had been knocked out of me. I just knew that I had it in the bag. No one could tell me that I did not study. I did. More so than anything I answered questions over and over and over again.
Once the computer shut off at 75 I was relieved as hell. Those questions were tough. I was practically squirming in the seat, praying for strength, and constantly monitoring the question numbers until I reached 75. I was delighted it cut off then because I did not know how much more punishment I could take. I might’ve died if I had to test all the way to 265. So, when it did cut off at 75 I was just as surprised as relieved. I left the testing center feeling lighter on my feet, but not having the slightest idea how it went for me. Not being one to be negative . . . I needed to believe that I had passed and the celebrations began.
The day that I returned to work, the Monday after Thanksgiving, I logged onto the Pearson Vue website for the unofficial quick results and saw the word fail “fail”. I just kept looking at the computer screen because it was so unbelievable. “There must be some mistake. Especially since they are unofficial results and all,” I kept saying to myself. There’s no way in the world I could’ve gone through all of that and failed that test. Well, that is exactly what happened.
My co-workers inquired about my results. “Oh, they haven’t come in yet,” I said.
In desperate need of advice, I contacted a former classmate who admitted in a group email that he failed it once too. He said two things that I have taken to heart: (1) take a small break studying again; and (2) change the way you study. In other words, do not do the same thing you did before. Made since to me.
Since the end of November 2007 until the second week in January, I have done no NCLEX studying. I have moaned a bit at the thought of starting that crap (studying) all over again.
My former classmate warned me against thinking that with Kaplan that a magic door would open up.
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